Today is also Bisexual (and Pansexual) Visibility Day! It happens to also be the 20th anniversary of this day! So many celebrations today! The first one was held in Johannesburg, South Africa in Sept 1999.
If you want to know about the history of Bisexual Awareness and Visibility campaigns, I highly suggest that you check out Bisexual History on Facebook. Their writers have a thorough catalogue of all things historically bi!
As I said last year, I identify as Queer - this is partly because I feel like its a better descriptor for me than bi or pan and it also comes with a political bent to it. More and more people understand what queer means now, but sometimes I come across a person that isn't aware that the word has been reclaimed by the community (Qmmunity!) In fact, my city apparently had a bit of an ethical debate over using the term Year of the Queer for the annual Pride festivities. From the article:
And I feel the same as Osmel, that reclaiming the word Queer is an act of power. The word cannot be used against me because I joyously use it to describe myself .😄
However, when people are unaware of what queer means, I often revert to using the term bi because most folx understand what that means (with some rather unhealthy stereotypes thrown in). But then again, this meme captures what often happens:
In fact, it's kind of happened to me in my own home... During one of our fights, Bear accused me of changing sexualities. That is, he shouted/asked me if I told my mother that I am no longer attracted to men. This really bothered me. I may be more of a 4 than a 3 on the Kinsey Scale (if you subscribe to such outdated models of sexuality) but I am still attracted to men. I'm just no longer attracted to him. I still find men attractive, but I'm not looking to start anything new with anyone. No matter what their gender.
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Pretty awesome shot of what looks like a falcon or corvid with a yak. From this Flickr account. |
I'm starting to "prepare myself" for the return of Birdfriend and Yak. It's hard to believe that they've been gone for more than five months, out in the wilderness, and hiking more than 2600 miles of the PCT. We've been writing and sending packages to each other, which has made their absence easier to bear. Plus all those messenger chats and video calls - I really appreciate the effort these two have made to stay in contact with me over the miles. And now there's less than a week until they return home! It feels a little unreal. In some ways, I don't feel "ready" for their return. I've had to stuff many of my thoughts and feelings into jars and shelve them for later consideration. But it's been hard to make space for that with all the apartment hunting, selling of my possessions, and cleaning my current residence because it's for sale and my landlady is aggressively showing it to prospective buyers. Then you add ongoing emotional abuse at home and you can understand when I say that my stress level is rather HIGH.
That said, I'm really looking forward to seeing the two of these beasts again! I miss them more than words can say. I am looking forward to reconnecting with my D/s energy again. I have definitely felt the absence of power play and the feel of heated flesh under my palm after giving a good spanking...I know that Birdfriend is also looking forward to reconnecting through play as well. It's been weird for me, sitting out all the kink parties all summer. And Yak....I am looking forward to all the cuddles, laughter, and spiritual connection that being with her brings. I worry that I may turn into a sobbing mess when I seem them both again, like when Birdfriend and Yak left, but I think not somehow. I think that I'm just ready for them to come home. Ready to have them physically near me again, in three dimensions, not just two. I'm organizing them a wee onesie/pj party to celebrate their return. So excited for cuddles!!! I know that all three of us are cuddle-deprived (for various reasons), so it'll be good to have my oxytocin tank refilled. It's damn near empty...
A sweet card that Birdfriend sent me from Oregon. So much love and cuddles! |